Nil Metaphase

Today I did some personal chromosomal analysis: karyotyping. Extracted some blood, cultured it in a growth medium to encourage cellular DNA synthesis and division, then killed the cells, stained them, and went looking for some metaphase chromosomes lined up ready for photographing. After a couple of hours I was the last person left in the lab. The supervisor tried and failed to find some viable “debris”. Eventually, after three different slide stains, one of the genetic techs who does this kind of thing for a living finally found some chromosomes. However, they were “lousy”. Apparently, my cells either don’t take orders and had refused to divide in the medium, or I am dead.

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