Research Project

Third dental visit in a month – I am beginning to feel like some sort of research project. At least I get amusing anecdotes.

The hygienist is full of stories about how she spent her youth smoking bowls and making out in Santa Cruz — there doesn’t seem to be much else to do there. apparently.

The dentist told me all about how oldtime dentists in the 1920s and 1930s used to X-ray the fuck out of their bollocks a few hours before a date, so if they “got lucky” they didn’t have to worry about producing fertile sperm. Charming. I wonder did they glow in the dark. No cancer worries then, apparently.

I just wish I could feel my face again – right now it feels huge like Bart Simpson blubber lips, but also weirdly absent.